MEN AT WORK

Lunch for 4 at Bhagat Tarachand – Rs 500

But this Saturday afternoon, the plans were altered a little bit

Price of 1 kg bhindi at Big bazaar - Rs 40

Tomato, Onion, Dal, Rice, vegetable oil – sourced internally

Two fine hands & loads of encouragement – sourced internally

Band aid for the occasional slip up by otherwise nimble fingers – Rs 5

Technical Advisory fee payable to fiancée – 2 dairy milks

A 4 course lunch well prepared– should I say PRICELESS, no way read further

Heartfelt thanks from newly engaged roommate for training him in the finer art of chappati making especially on issues related to tactical use of flour to reduce stickiness of dough –PRICELESS!

Key learnings from the day at work

• Proven again , that unlike women, men can never really multitask. That’s the reason why one meal required three men to work simultaneously for a little more than 1.5 hours
• Every rice cooker has its own personality. Know your cooker before you cook.
• Shallow fry and deep fry are two different methods of frying
• Never feel ashamed about the mess you make in the kitchen, your roommate can always clean it up

Ajab movie ki ghazab kahani

I didn’t read any reviews, just walked in into the theatre. Likewise, SWACC also did, we did not want any reviews to spoil our anticipation of some pure unadulterated fun in the movie. Yes, slapstick is back, yippee. But it’s new, it’s different its slapstick with class, panache and spoofs across most movies of popular genre over the last year or two. Just that you need to pay little attention to recognize it. Now who said, slapstick doesn’t test your intelligence or stimulate your intellectual quotient.

Okie having said all that, the kahani is an absolute no brainer. Who cares?. Till date, I never ever understood the story in a single Charlie Chaplin movie, but never remember not enjoying one. The laughs start with the first shot; refuse to die down until the interval. There is a lull in between, where the poor director has realized he needs to build a story to make any sense at all. After that we are back again, laugh till the credits are drawn down.

Honestly, the last time I enjoyed a comedy movie so much was Dhamaal a couple of years ago. But since then, just Singh is King was decent, not great though. But this one really cool. Its sweet, unadulterated humor about the romance between a dumb guy and intelligent woman.

Ranbir Kapoor is a big star in the making. I just can’t resist this. Don’t you think, he very closely resembles the Acadcom secy of our IIMI 2007 batch in more ways than one :). Well, subh should be able to better answer that one :). Well! Ranbir can definitely play the sweet, laidback, innocent guy better than anyone else in the industry now.

Katrina Kaif can act!. Okie that might be like asking for a little too much. But the lady can definitely make funny faces at least. That’s more than what the movie could ask from her. Of course, she has the mandatory item number for front bencher titillation :). Hello! Why blame the front benchers always, when the back seat elite are equally savoring the jhatkas and matkas.

If you’re like me, just want to have a good time, without expecting a good story or its historical background or thrill of a whodunit, then just go and check out this movie :).

Cheers

Nostalgia

zindagi ke safar mein,guzar jate hain jo makam
woh phir nahin aate,
woh phir nahin aate

phool khilte hain,
log milte hain
phool khilte hain,
log milte hain magar
patjhad main jo phool
murjha jate hain
woh baharon ke aane se khilte nahin

kuchh log ek roz jo bichad jate hain
woj hazaron ke aane se milte nahin
umr bhar chahe koi pukara kare unka naam
woh phir nahin aate,
woh phir nahin aate

subaah aate hai
raat jaate hai
subaah aate hai
raat jaate hai yuhi

waqt chalta hi rehta hai rukta nahi
ek pal me ye aage nikal jaata hai
aadmi theek se dekh paata nahin
aur parde pe manzar badal jaata hai

ek baar chale jaate hai jo din raat subaah shaam
woh phir nahi aate
woh phir nahi aate

zindagi ke safar mein,guzar jate hain jo makam
woh phir nahin aate,
woh phir nahin aate

Time please!

I want a break! [shout]
I want change, change for good, good that stays good long enough
I believe in a fair world
I don't believe in destiny, but I just like to blame it
Did this recession change my life?
or wait is the recession over?. banking analyst at home thinks otherwise
I think KRK should win big boss season 3
And Nandita Sharma is the perfect bride
Kannada is my mother tongue fine, but some one tell me what this movie title means "Chamkaisi Chindi Udaisi"
Does anyone know that there is cricket tournament going on right now ? some champions league or something ?
Joke: Shashi Tharoor this time angers home minister PC for tweeting about something he heard on the BIG FM.
Facebook & Farmville done .. what fad next?

Ok. Break over. Now back to work

Bai Heart

You read it right, the title of the post has been spelt correctly. The post is dedicated to our house maid for the last 2.5 years. Her name is Aunty, or wait, I just realised that all this while I never ever asked her what her real name was, but I had trusted her with a pair of house keys, so that she can finish with her household chores and cooking during mid day, while all of us guys busy with work at the office.

Bai plays a very important role at a crucial juncture in every young man's life especially in a city like Mumbai. It is that specific age, when mother has put in her papers and taken a voluntary retirement from all responsibilities of her now big enough son. But the wife to-be who theoretically is supposed to be taking over from the mother, is still busy juggling work pressure at office and pressure from parents to get married. When the decision becomes so difficult, she finds the easier way out in postponing the marriage decision. Now this is where, the Bai pitches in with those splendid alu ki sabzi and dal makhani, and once in a while on those few good days, a phirni or paneer parathas. One of the reason our bais enjoys working at our place is the total autonomy we grant her. She works on flexi timings. She decides on the menu for the day, which mostly depends on her mood at that time and also the vegetables we had bought on the weekend. When the vegetable stock is exhausted, the signal is very simple. Soaked channa and green gram make their appearance.

Bai sometimes play a very proactive role as well. Like, if you don't put your clothes for wash regularly, she even takes the privilege to scout through your personal clothing & herself chooses the ones needing a wash. A friend had an extreme-bai experience, when his elderly bai threatened to inform his mother about his excessive smoking & drinking habits. Damn, the threat worked. Bai's definitely don't like mommies visiting their sonnies. Now with mommy monitoring every step of their work, their effectiveness needs to be doubled. Mommies don't understand the cost of living factor in Mumbai and feel its their right get the bai work for every penny they pay her. No wonder, mommies visits have been ranked reason #1 for the high attrition among bais in Mumbai, as per one survey published in respected Mumbai mirror tabloid.

For teaching the few words in marathi to issuing flood warnings on rainy days, It is time I said, Thank you aunty. I know, I really liked the corn palak and alu paratha you cooked today. But this thank you has a wider scope and is meant for everything you do to make our poor bachelor life a little bit better. Long time since we had phirni, if you don't mind, please. You can find the kaju – kishmish on the second drawer on the right :).

Two trips and a hundred stories to tell

When the weekends are longer than usual and parents don't want you back home ever so often, what does a "bored with the routine" - bachelor living in a far away city do ?. He goes tripping.


Trip - 1 (Mt. Abu & Udaipur)

My trip advisor widget on facebook, indicated that most parts of India were fairly well visited by me, except for a large part of Rajasthan. Rajasthan has been on my travel radar ever since 1985, when my grandparents ditched the 3 year old me and went visiting Mt. Abu, Ranakpur and Udaipur. The paeans they had been singing about the places ever since, had built up a cherished desire in me to check out these places especially Dilwara temples in Mt. Abu and City palace & lakes in Udaipur. But being far away from any of the metros, they had been lying idle on my wish list until recently.


Trip invites were sent out to all my buddies, but somehow none of them could take time out. So I ventured out on my hippie trail - lonely backpacker on heritage sojourn.. or rather to "journey to rediscover my soul" in true hippie parlance. Jokes apart, Lonely backpacker trips are not so lonely, if you have planned it out well. Like I had already booked one day/ half day hop-on-hop-off tours at each of these places, from mumbai itself. So I always had a big group of people to travel with. Moreover, these tours provide the additional benefit of a free local guide, who becomes really important, if one has to enjoy a heritage trip, which means understanding the local history, culture, art & architecture.


First hop, Mt. Abu. It was a pleasant surprise to see so much greenery in a place I least expected - Rajasthan. The place is nice with a sprawling lake to add effect. But what sets the place apart from any other hill station, is Dilwara temples. I have seen beautiful temples before - Belur, Halebidu & Somanathapura in Karnataka are black granite marvels. Temples at Khajuraho & Konark are exquisite. Swami Narayan temples in Delhi and Ahmedabad are spell binding. But they are still no match, to the sheer beauty of the 10th century white marble carvings of dilwara temples. If I say not an inch is left uncarved, It would not be an exaggeration. Where would you find, entire chandeliers carved out of marble and hanging down the roof!. Just the 30 mins I spent at the 5 temples, were total paisa vasool for all the pains taken to travel to Mt. Abu. When in Rajasthan, eat rajasthani food. So it was Daal baati for brunch, followed by churma for evening snacks and bajre ki roti with subzi for dinner. The company of Scouts and guides from the local school, a travelling group of friends from Slovenia and old retired couple on perhaps one of their last honeymoons, were among the many different people, I got to know on the one day spent at Mt. Abu.


The early morning journey from Mt. Abu to Udaipur was a breeze . A quick 4 hour drive through more greenery and much talked about Rajasthan highways made it unexpectedly comfortable. At first glance, I felt Udaipur, rated as the best travel destination in the world by some reputed magazine, is more hype than substance. Why has it succeeded, when so many others failed you might wonder ?. The reason is simple, most heritage properties in the town are managed by private business of the local Raja, a shrewd businessmen in his own right. Everything is so neatly organised, the guides are supremely knowledgeable with plenty of anecdotes to spare, tourist facilities are all top notch. All these together elevate, an average fort & palace day outing into a superb heritage experience. Now, I do find the top rating for Udaipur somewhat justified. Other than the city palace, the only other place worth a dekko here is boating on Fatehsagar lake. It is nice with park built on the island right in the middle of the lake. When in Udaipur, shopping for souvenirs is the best end-of-day activity. Miniature paintings in the Mewar styles for the drawing room wall, Bandini saree (for Mom, I clarify) and beautiful hand crafted puppets. And yes, Don't forget to get your own photo clicked in the traditional Rajasthani attire. His Royal Highness Maharajah Shreyan Singh Mewar, atleast for 5 minutes if not more.

Trip-2 (Kashid & Murud - Janjira)

Well, this is where we left from the previous blog post. Bertie's bachelors party. Destination - Kashid beach & Murud-Janjira fort. After losing our way many times, we finally reached Kashid beach resort, late on Saturday night. It was late enough to douse all possibilities of a campfire by the beach, as we were well past the 11 PM deadline. Nevertheless, we had a nice resort with an awesome sports room. The plan was simple, wake up in time for an early morning beach rendezvous. Kashid was our beach of choice, clear blue water & fine sand, add to this privacy offered by one of the least crowded stretches of sea, without any stink of fisher men's catch. From jogging to sunbathing, from surfing the waves to building sand castles, From beach football to Frisbee, it was gala time for the bunch of 7 guys and a welcome break from the hectic worklife.

After a heavy breakfast, we were off to Janjira fort. The first view of the fort left us all completely stunned. A steep cliff leading directly into the sea and a short distance away a beautiful fort right in the middle of the sea. Very much like Sicily & Greek sea side, as shown in many hollywood classics. The 1 km sail boat journey from the coast to the fort was a first time experience for me. The jitters you get when the wind direction suddenly changes, is something you should experience to tell. The fort is really cool, with some amazing views of the surrounding area.

All in all, two great trips and several memorable moments archived for posterity.

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The following section has been added after the author received lots of gaalis, threats and like reactions from housemates for underplaying trip - 2 at the cost of trip - 1.

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  Bertie almost ditched his own bachelor's party, citing bad mood as the ostensible reason. It took the author a lot of convincing using the standard tools of senti, angry, trust, betrayal, gaalis, finally request to get him going eventually
  
  
  
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  Bertie uploaded pics on picasa web album only after intense screening and censorship by all involved. Some pot bellies are best left to the imagination of the viewer
  
  
  
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  Yes it is true, u heard it rite. Even at the beach, Da-1 was reading "The house of Morgan", about what else but Finance. Wait, to be fair to him, besides reading he also jogged for little more than 15 minutes
  
  
  
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  Bansi lost 5 kgs in just 2 hours. How ?. Ask him only
  
  
  
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  I built a 3 floor sand castle, which survived just 30 minutes, when it was eventually destroyed by Anman's swerving free kick
  
  
  
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  Our qualis driver Imran was the star of the trip. He made sure, we didnt miss the formula one race on sunday evening, by driving a force india qualis himself. Mr. Mallya ... listening ???, we have just found some real talent at the bottom of the pyramid
  
  
  

7 ways to annoy your newly engaged housemate

1) Poor soul, is on phone engaged in a romantic conversation, when the evil others continuously invade his privacy and eavesdrop on his conversation, and once in a while shout aloud, "Bugger! Finish off the beer before it gets stale!". The teetotaller him is utterly embarrassed and wife to-be of teetotaller is shocked beyond measure ... Hehe

2) Call the bluff, just at the wrong time, when the he is on phone with his to-be, promising to build her a Taj Mahal in the Mughal gardens of Dharavi.

3) Get an expensive treat at the best Italian restaurant in the town, by getting him all senti about the last few days of his bachelor life and the impending slavery thereafter. Pasta Barbaruscha with broccoli sauce isn't too bad a return for a little investment in draaame baazi.

4) Steal the special gift (A box of Ferraro Rocher, if i am not wrong), he has bought for her and hide it just in time, when he wants to courier it across to her

5) Watch the engagement pics and finally tell him, his fiancee definitely looks better than him :). Ignore complaints from him that the photographer was from the girl's side and had vested interests

6) Hand him the lion's share of the household work, so that the experience will put him in good stead for managing his future responsibilities

7) Write a blog post on him, telling the whole world, how his housemates take his case and trouble him a lot these days

PS: You are not invited to our dude's bachelor's party, some fun around the bonfire coming Saturday, at a secluded beach somewhere south of Navi Mumbai. Now those invited please answer your roll call

Da 1 - yes sir!

Da 2 - yes sir!

Anman - yes sir!

Bansi - yes sir!

Bertie - of course sir!

It is that ganapathy time of the year again

In Mumbai, It usually begins with Dahi Handi @ Janmashtmi in august and goes on all the way till Holi in march. Every festival in between is celebrated with such fervour, that it just leaves me totally fascinated. It is a no holds barred celebration.With every region, every religion adequately represented in this cosmopolitan city, the housing society just needs a reason venture out onto the streets with their characteristic music & dance.

For the last 2 years, yours truly had the privilege to get a bird's eye view of all procession on Mumbai's very own Champs Des Elysee's at Mori road, Mahim nested cozily at his 2nd floor apartment balcony.

Today was the big visarjan day. Ganapathies were all heading towards the seas, while I rushed on in the opposite direction towards the airport. With no public transport operating today, I had to walk past each procession tableau. First I saw the small sized gujju society ganapathy. Least noisy, I must say. The Procession ambles along to the sweet sounding chant of bhajans. Not far behind, is huge Kalinacha raja, with the brass bands & marathi songs adding to the excitement. More than the song, it is the dance. I really like this marathi procession dance, but my gujju friends at the garba claim their's is better. But coming from karnataka, u both are better, I would say.

Surprise! Surprise!. The next ganapathy is from shanmugananda south indian society. But it is usual suspect Apdi pode pode blaring from their speakers. The dance is a little wild, with mostly men swaying their lungis.

Even before ganapathy festivities begin to fade from your memories , Gujrathi's begin their dance till you drop, dance all night garba on all the Navrathris. Tired already, amar banglo bandhu have kali pooja to follow. Diwali soon after needs no introduction. But the fireworks spectacle at marine drive's golden necklace is quite unlike anything you might have seen earlier. This diwali the govt. promises to do sydney harbour bridge on our very own Bandra- Worli sea link. That would be one firework display worth waiting for.

Mumbai truly lives up to its reputation as the nation's cultural pot pourri.

I really love the festivals here.

The First Martian

The next great frontier for human space endeavour is definitely to send humans to Mars. Several technical feasibility studies have been conducted, it has been concluded that the single biggest challenge is to protect the humans & their environment from harmful cosmic radiation. If the report is to be believed, the good news is that NASA currently has the technology for executing this project. But the protective shield supposedly makes the spacecraft so heavy, that the fuel requirement makes the project unbelievably expensive and hence financially unfeasible.

Besides, questions have also been raised about the very need of a return trip. The moon landings by the Apollo spacecrafts have often been criticised for being mere symbolic achievements and not valuable scientific experiments, whose learning could be used for the betterment of mankind. Much of this failure has been attributed to the longevity of our stay on moon.

How about a one way ticket to mars ?. Scary it might sound at first instance, there are several reasons, why it might be the best way forward. To understand this, let us consider a parallel in discovery of the New World in the 15th & 16th centuries. Little was achieved, by mere sighting of the new world by the likes of Magellan or Columbus. More remembered, are the fearless commanders like Captain Cook & Don Juan, who set foot on the new world and conquered the locals and established their settlement. None of these guys, left their homes, with any hopes of returning back. May be the situation back home was so desperate, that unknown new world was better bet than the unbearable familiarity of routine existence. May be our lives today are not that desperate, but the growth in population and the competition for limited resources, will definitely create a bleak picture for humanity in the next couple of centuries. You would rather die of solar radiation in mars than from the shock waves of nukes blown by the Americans in the war for control of a last of still in production oilfield.

However, Fear need not be the only motivation. What about the freaky tendencies of human nature?. A generation grown up on a healthy diet of star wars and star treks, would be crazy enough to attempt such risky endeavours. Are human lives more valuable than money?. Mercenaries trade their lives for financial well being of the families in Afghanistan. But yes there is no justification for such unethical acts. But the fact remains, that if given an opportunity, there would be a lot many volunteers. What about old people above 60 or terminally ill patients, do they want to just fade away into oblivion or do something spectacular to leave a lasting impression for generations to come. Read Randy Pausch's Last Lecture, you will know what I am talking about.

Now let us look at how this can be practical. Our existence in mars address both our physical and mental well being. A good understanding can be derived from psychological theories of motivation like Maslow's hierarchy of needs.

First physiological needs, breathing, food, water, sleep, excretion. Since it has been evaluated, that cost of unmanned mission is 10 times cheaper than a manned one. These needs can be taken care of.

Second comes the safety needs - security, employment, resources, property, family & health. A suitable compensation for the participant's family back on earth should address this issue.

Third is the emotional need. To understand this, let us consider the parallel world called Second life. In an increasing virtual connected world, people seek to lead a parallel existence where they can obtain and achieve all the things that they don't manage to in the real world. Many spend more time interacting with online friends than real ones. While being in mars, you might be physically separate from your near and dear. But you can virtually continue to live amongst the same people. If one considers the progress made by the science of virtual reality, I believe setting up such an environment is well within grasp of current levels of available technology to cater to all the five senses like 3D visualization, touch sensors & transmitters, Surround sound, smell sensors & generators and ofcourse taste .

Fourthly, Esteem needs can definitely be addressed as the individual will be celebrated across the human world. Moreover, an individual will also be alive and connected to soak in all the adulation for such an extraordinary acts, which mostly have been the preserve of martyrs. Such a rare opportunity will be motivation enough for many.

Finally the self actualization need, it requires an extra ordinary personality with strong spiritual beliefs to finally make this work. This is one area that never requires a factual justification. Our faith in the known and fear of the unknown, will always prod us to pursue the never has been done before.

Sometimes I wonder if the first martian project would be a reality in my present life. I know I am just intrinsically skeptical like everyone else. but if past history is any evidence, Scientific progress has always stayed a pace ahead of all predictions of even science fiction writers.

I believe there will be a first martian soon. I wish I would be the one.

The Good, the Bad & the Idly

Yes & No .. Yes, this is a review of Quickgun Murugun .. No, it is not a Hindi movie ... No, It is not a English movie .. Yes, It is Tamil movie. Adda paavi! whatisthisisay .

To begin with, let me tell you this is no movie, it is a spoof. Mind It!. Circa 1982, Cowboy the protector of cows tries to protect only veg hoteliers from serving non veg, as under the orders of evil don Rice plate reddy garu. Mindless you might say, but still Mind it!. Who cares, when our cowboy's acting in the entire movie is performed by his two guns - QUICK gun and MURU gun. The various permutations and combinations in styles of firing the two guns forms the crux of our hero's special abilities and accounts for nearly 1 hour of this 1.5 hour movie.

Technically speaking this a double cross spoof movie. First, its a western crossed over into kollywood, with that distinct accent and style like in the 70s. Now you not just spoof this idea further, but make a second cross over into bollywood's mumbai. To be honest, the movie's first half is mostly dedicated to characters resembling Tamil movie stars of 70s and 80s, with hero serenading his lady to some vague tam songs, which most non tams would have rarely ever heard before, let alone identifying with them. Only If they had included a classic crossover tam song, the likes of Apdi Pode Pode Pode, half the audience would have been drawn into a informal jig.

Now the spoofgate does'nt end there. Elevating himself to the standard hollywood fare, the script writer tries to bring in more elements. The villain is a Ghajini lookalike in the first half with his fetish for violent indulgences, suddenly turns into a evil corporate honcho with a Mogambo look alike attire in the second half. Helloo!! Will someone with a dictionary read out the meaning of the word consistency.

Thankfully, the second half slips into some semblance of a story line, however amateurish it might have been. In Rowdy MBA and Matunga mummies, there is a hint of humour snaking its way back into the story. Rowdy MBA is a satire on how consultants armed with MBA degrees hoodwink clients with the GYAN. The sequences involving matunga mummies are the most hilarious, in the search of the one exceptionally tasty dosa preparing mummy.

Yes, there are heroines. Anu Menon aka Lola Kutty trying to do Priya Tendulkar in Hum Paanch. What is Lola Kutty without her outrageous Mallu accent and Gajra fitted attire ?. A damp squib. Thankfully, there is Rambha, the mumbai moll trying to seduce the conservative tamilian boy in murugan. Some credit to the director, for attempting to bring out the cultural contrast between conservative south indian boys and modern mumbai girls.

For a very long time, I have been waiting for a really bad movie to write a review on.

Spare the dosa and spoil the batter.
Can we have some idly instead please!