And the Animals strike back ..

As the Swines in Mexico decide that it’s the most opportunistic time to strike back at their more prosperous neighbours, little did they expect, that average Mexican Senor would become the unintended target.

Even as Swine flu/SARS over take recession /TARP as the most searched key words on google, I am reminded of boars in George Orwell’s Animal Farm. “All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others”, proclaimed the Old Major.

The banner of revolt was first raised by the Mad cows of Europe. The uprising was brutally culled, even if it meant Mcdonalds had to redesign their menu and the favourite steak was off the standard British lunch fare. The cows licking their wounds , soon realised their folly in understanding the global food chain.

Like the complacent US software developer of the 80s, they did not realise that for every cow in Europe, there are two chickens volunteering for a slaughter in China. Even the Chinese govt.’s once chick policy per cock and hen, still left enough chickens available for slaughter, that can feed the entire African population for the next 100 years.

Globalization had already arrived, but the cows came home late. As dumb as they cows may be, there is always the one smart red bull, who by sheer destiny or a genetic experiment gone wrong was born intelligent. For him, reaching out to the far east was very easy. He registered himself on Baidu/Qzone, the most popular social networking site in china. A community he started, within a matter of hours attracted a million chickens eagerly waiting for a channel to express their suppressed freedom. The banner of revolt was raised again, the chickens started a LONG MARCH from their pens/pickets to the KFCs directly, while surpassing the greedy middle men. Lured in by the abysmal low price offered, KFC bit the bullet. Little could they see of the SARS/bird flu lurking beneath dangerously . Soon the word was out, "Chinese chickens are more toxic than Chinese toys". Now that toys and chickens were out of equation, Chinese economy was forecast to decline by 10%. But Iron Fist of the communist govt. eventually prevailed and the brave chickens of the Talumein soup were all martyred. Few had noticed, the resilience and the rebellion was already silently brewing among the most wretched of the lot – PIGS.

In the meanwhile, Indian govt. hailed the success of their DECOUPLING THEORY. They claim, Indian food chain is highly decoupled from the global food chain. We neither consume any beef to give the mad cows any semblance of a chance nor do Chinese chickens ever possibly land on an Indian plate, due to the 200% anti dumping duty imposed on Chinese food imports. All the ones being smuggled through north east and Nepal usually got consumed even before reaching the main land.

Now coming to the crux of the problem, a recent study by WHO has listed Indian pigs are the most unhygienic among pigs across the world. With the war, now shifting to pig front and having already taken a size able human toll in Mexico, its not long before the Indian pig shows its ugly face.

While the pigs across face the wrath, it is also time the pigs among men to take the beating. It wouldn’t come as a surprise, if feminist organisations start a rally against the male chauvinistic pig , as the main perpetrator of the malaise that affect the Indian society. As I say always, to each(animal) his own.

But it’s the Chinese year of the DOG. The dogs are rocking across the world. Whether it’s the SLUMDOG at the Oscars or the UNDERDOG at the IPL in South Africa, the dogs are soaking in all the attention. While BO replaces BUDDY at the white house, the hutch pug has decided to work only 6 months a year, hence not to be seen at IPL this year.

As they also say, every dog has its day.